The View from Here

How Times Change

 

I was standing on the porch this morning at 4am watching our cat, Babe, eat her breakfast on one side and her daily morning visitor eat at the other, when it occurred to me how much our morning routine has changed over the past year. Babe, once an “inside-outside” cat has become strictly an outside citizen due to some intolerably strange habits she developed. Our once shy morning visitor has gone from curious and cautious to confident and comfortable. I used to worry about Babe getting her fair share of breakfast. Now I just put out two portions. This morning she was eating at her plate and the raccoon peeked over the edge of the porch and put one paw on the old mailbox that sits there. I said, “You know where yours is; get over to the other end!” and gestured with my arm. He backed off, waddled across the yard, and over to the other end of the porch. Lol I decided I had to get a picture, so I went back inside for the camera. When he heard the door again he hid behind the lawn mower. I just went back to Babe’s plate and waited. Sure enough he was out in a flash to finish eating. When I went inside I remarked to Gary that the first time we saw the raccoons I had to wait by the front window every night for a week in order to get one grainy, blurry photo. Now I can stand on the porch and ask one of them to pose! (The others are still afraid of me.)

Today is different in other ways. For years I was sad on this day, but today I am just thankful. Yes, today is the day my mother was born. The calendar marks so many days that we never forget: birthdays of the living and the dead, anniversaries celebrated and those best forgotten, days of joy and of sorrow. The date is a reminder of all that we gained and lost with the existence of just one person. Mother would have loved the raccoons and laughed with me at their antics. I miss her, but I am so very grateful for the time we had together.

It's a Mad, Mad World

Someone told me something yesterday that broke my heart. Because of flu fears her school is no longer giving students “high fives” or holding the hands of little ones. Have we gone mad????????? Are gloves and masks next?

My very first year of teaching I was informed that I had a child in my room whose parents were both HIV positive. The child had been tested, with negative results, but I was told I should be cautious. Some colleagues suggested I refrain from hugging him. I treated that kid like every other student in my room. I just decided that if the administration had deemed him safe enough to be in school, I wasn’t going to treat him like a leper. After all, I don’t kiss my students, I don’t eat or drink after them, I don’t clean up vomit or blood without gloves and precautions. I’ve taken all the classes. I’m not stupid. I don’t even tie shoes.

That’s one of the quirky things about me that students learn the first week. Mrs. Maurer will not tie your shoes- learn to tie them yourself, wear shoes that don’t have to be tied, or find a friend who can tie shoes. I always tell them it is because my hands have arthritis, which is true, but the real reason is that shoe laces are the nastiest things on earth! They’ve been in the bathroom, on the ground, in the dog’s mouth, in the closet and under the bed. They’ve had everything from pee to Popsicle spilled on them and yet they are seldom, if ever, washed.  Yuk!

 I grew up in the shadow of polio. My neighbor’s daughter was in an iron lung- a device few people of my generation have even seen. My first serious, adult job was as an EKG technician in a major teaching hospital and one of my “rotations” was the TB ward. We had to be covered from head to toe to even go through the door. I understand that our natural instinct is to fear disease. But I think we’ve let the media intensify that fear with this flu.

Years ago I wrote an article about “touching” for a parenting magazine. Authorities in the childcare industry were at that time encouraging teachers and others to stop patting, hugging, and holding hands with children for fear that some actions would be interpreted by others as abusive. That’s when the student gesture “give yourself a pat on the back” became popular because teachers were afraid to do it themselves! There are teachers today who will not pat, hug, or hold a child in any way for fear of recriminations. Again, a little reasonable thought is in order. I don’t hug my students to my chest or face- I use the “side hug” or “sister hug”. I pat on the shoulder. These kids need a pat! They thrive on hugs. They want to show their love and appreciation by hugging. We can’t stop hugging them or tell them to stop, and expect them to have any sort of emotional bond with others. Neither fear of disease nor fear of appearances is an excuse for treating a child like a social outcast.  

So here we are- flu season. The stomach virus- with vomiting and diarrhea- has already made the rounds at our school. Not as media worthy as the H1N1, but something I don’t want to get. This week I had car duty, so I opened the car door for at least thirty children each morning. That means I touched thirty door handles that had been touched by parents, children, and who knows who else. I made sure I didn’t touch my eyes or nose during duty and afterwards I washed my hands thoroughly. I figured that was a little less intimidating than greeting our students in a mask and gloves!!

My point is that we have to be reasonable about this flu situation. There have always been dangers in the world, and in the classroom, and there always will be. We can’t react to them by punishing the children. I’m going to keep doing what I’ve always done- teach and touch. I’m going to encourage my children to wash their hands and cover their mouths when they cough or sneeze, because that is what we have been teaching our children for decades. I’m going to have them wipe their desks with anti-bacterial wipes twice a week because we get dirty. I’m not going to scare them with flu stories.

By the way, my student’s parents both died- one at the beginning of the year, and one at the end of the year. I’m glad I hugged him!

 

My Thanks to Ed Sullivan

Gary and I enjoy watching America’s Got Talent. I know it’s a bit wild and crazy at times. But I love seeing what people will do for fifteen minutes of fame, and the judges really have “discovered” some awesome talent. I put the word discovered in quotes because I’m never certain how much of these shows are scripted, rehearsed, “rigged” or whatever. I don’t want to know. I don’t want to follow the Hoff blog or check the website for weekly updates and back stage gossip. I just want to be entertained for an hour. The singers and dancers and jugglers and magicians are just what I need as a break from crime shows and too much reality. Not so sure about the judges sometimes.  I appreciate that Sharon likes dogs and kids, but I’m not a big fan of hers and can’t stand her husband. David is amusing, but too, too corny. Piers is often a voice of reason, even when it’s a whiny voice. And Nick is a good host, but he’s no Ed Sullivan.

Ed was THE MAN.  And his show brought the talent of the world into our living rooms. The Ed Sullivan Show ( originally The Toast of the Town) wasn’t just entertainment; it was education and cultural evolution. The Ed Sullivan Show was the longest running variety show in TV history. It was on from before I was born (1948) to the year Katrina was born (1971)! Amazing! Ed showcased people we couldn’t wait to hear, along with people we’d never heard of, but would soon be talking about over dinner. Where else could you see Maria Callas, Yul Brenner, Rudolf Nureyev, Henry Fonda, Barbra Streisand, Elvis, Topo Gigio, and The Beatles? Ed tried to think of everyone in his audience, including children and teenagers. He brought over 10,000 acts to the stage. They don’t make shows like that anymore.

People made fun of Ed. His stiffness and lack of stage presence were fodder for comedians. His phrases, such as “really big shew” were imitated by everyone. But I think Ed was brilliant and his show was responsible for exposing me to opera, ballet, Broadway musicals, and the Beatles. Without his show I’m not sure any of those would have been a part of my isolated farm life. After fifty years I can still clearly remember some of the shows and performers I watched as a young child. I’m not sure I’ll remember too many of the acts from America’s Got Talent next week. Thanks Ed!

 

 

Are they CRAZY????

I have some harsh things to say today, so if you aren’t in the mood, just come back tomorrow. You know me- I can’t stay cranky for very long. J

My niece sent me a link to a story out of the UK. It’s from the Daily Express and you can link to read all of it later. The gist of the story is that the government is going to monitor 20,000 “problem” families with 24-hour surveillance:

“They will be monitored to ensure that children attend school, go to bed on time and eat proper meals. Private security guards will also be sent round to carry out home checks, while parents will be given help to combat drug and alcohol addiction.”

 

If you continue reading and you link to a couple of other sites and pay attention to the comments you may come to the conclusion, as I did, that the report contains a few errors. Some of the families will be monitored at home, some in public housing- residential blocks called “sin bins”. Some will have cameras and others will simply get home visits. It’s a complicated plan with several components.

 

I only have a few of things to say about this. First, just because someone knows how to breed, does not make them a parent in any sense of the word. I understand why authorities at every level are desperate to crack down on drug and alcohol abuse and to improve the lives of our children. Children do NOT get to pick their parents, and even though they may love them, they also do not necessarily need to be raised by them. I am not one of those “biology at any cost” proponents. Some children are better off if separated from their biological parents. However, I’m not sure the government is going in the right direction with this solution. I can see at least a dozen problems with this plan, and I’m sure you have your own opinion. I’m going to leave this one alone.

 

However, what did catch my eye and is really my focus this morning is a minor statement in the article:

“Mr. Balls (Children’s Secretary) also said responsible parents who make sure their children behave in school will get new rights to complain about those who allow their children to disrupt lessons.”

According to two articles I read all parents in the UK will be required to sign Home School Agreements and promise to make their children behave in school. HSAs have routinely been used in the UK, but for the first time parents MUST sign them, and they will be LEGALLY binding. The HSA “will set out rules on behavior, attendance, school uniform and homework. Parents will have a duty to ensure children meet the tough code.” Parents breaking the contract “can be served with civil ‘parenting orders’ by magistrates' courts, forcing mothers and fathers to attend parenting courses or counseling sessions and ensuring children are at home at night or kept clear of bad influences. Orders are backed by fines of up to £1,000.” There is also a legal “tattling” clause for other parents- "If other parents feel that the HSA is not being enforced against other parents they will be able to tell the local education authority." Mr. Balls added: "Heads (teachers) will be able to say to the recalcitrant parents, if you do not sign this or make sure they do the homework, or support discipline, then we will take that as evidence in the magistrates' court."

Oh my! Where do I start? Are they CRAZY????

As a parent, let me just start with the obvious. Any parent who promises their child will behave in school is either delusional or lying. I’ve used parent contracts before. Most explain the rules and ask parent to verify that they have read the school handbook, the classroom rules, and the teacher’s homework policy so you don’t get “well, I didn’t know…” excuses when things go wrong. Most ask the parent to monitor things that are under their control- homework, bedtime, attendance. However, even that last one isn’t always possible. Parents don’t get to control how often their child is truly ill. Never, have I asked a parent to promise that their child would behave in my classroom! That is a promise I want from the child.

I’ve had some very unruly children in the past ten years. Some of them had parents who contributed to the problems. Some had parents who simply ignored the problems. Some had parents who worked with me each and every day and were as baffled by their child’s behavior as anyone else!! When will we understand that children are PEOPLE. They are individuals, not clones of their parents, not simply products of their upbringing. They are complicated bundles of genes, personality, environment, and attitude, among other things. Yes, I want parents to work with me. Yes, I want them to encourage their child to behave. Yes, I want them to do everything they can to create a good environment for their child. But do I hold them responsible for everything their child does?? Heavens, no.

And who PAYS for this?? No doubt there will be lots of paperwork. There will be administration. There will be legal fees. There will be time lost from work. Ultimately the cost will be taken out of money, time, and energy that should be directly spent on the students! That is what always happens with these government intervention programs. I’m not sure of the situation in the UK, but here money that is spent on implementing the new idea of someone who probably hasn’t been in a classroom since his own school days could go to the classrooms where teachers are buying their own paper and glue!!   

Okay, let’s talk just a bit about the tattling clause. I understand how parents feel if little Johnnie goes home and reports that teacher spends most of her classroom time making Bully Bob behave. However, I don’t think I want my parents taking legal action against each other! I don’t want to go to court to testify. (Been there, done that by the way, when a very, very serious situation presented itself and I reported one of my parents to the Sheriff.) I don’t want one of my parents to decide that she is the neighborhood “bedtime monitor” or “homework monitor”, or whatever! If the government is really concerned about parents who are abusing drugs and alcohol then they should realize that parents could actually hurt or kill each other over this type of spying. And where do we draw the line? --“I saw Bob’s dad drinking a beer.” “Bob’s bedroom light was still on at 10pm.” “Bob’s mom curses.”

And last, but not least, I do NOT want to waste my time monitoring twenty sets of parents! I have my hands full teaching their children! I do not want to keep a checklist of who does what and then turn it in to the authorities! Yes, I speak to my parents if their child falls asleep in my class. Yes, I talk to them about anything that concerns them. But our relationship needs to be a partnership. I think a legally binding contract simply sets us up to be adversaries.

My soapbox isn’t tall enough to solve this problem. But I will certainly keep my eyes open for more developments in the UK.  

I sure hope this idea doesn’t appeal to anyone on this side of the ocean!

 

 MailOnline

 

Telegraph

 

Daily Express 

 

 

 

 

Healthcare Reform

As I sit here pondering what to write this morning I can hear our President talking to reporters about health care reform. We talk a lot about health care in this nation. The trouble is that we don’t do much to “reform” it. We all seem to agree that what we have doesn’t quite work, but even the experts don’t agree on what to do about it.

A prime example of what needs to change was brought to my attention just last week. Gary had to have a simple lace-up ankle brace to wear for a few weeks until the muscles and tendons in his ankle are stronger. He had a prescription from his doctor and got one at the local medical supply store. Bill to Medicare- $81. We later saw the same brace hanging on a rack at the local pharmacy for $16.99. Now I have absolutely no expertise in this area, but I’m thinking something is wrong! Reminds me of the fiascoes in military spending that have been brought to our attention in recent years.

I don’t want to have a government-managed health care system because, so far, they don’t have a very good track record for managing anything, including the government. If you want a preview of how they would manage healthcare, take a long look at the VA system. I don’t want to spend three hours in a waiting room and see a different doctor each time I have a problem.  I want the option to choose my own doctor and make decisions about my medications and tests and surgeries. However, I do think there are some things that need to be regulated by someone, somewhere, just to make sure the poor and elderly aren’t getting mistreated or cheated. And I have the crazy notion that health care should be free for any child under five, regardless of which parents they happen to get stuck with.

I think it benefits all of us as a society if our poor, elderly, and children are getting proper health care. We will save money in the long run because we won’t have so many people in emergency rooms and nursing homes. I think it benefits all of us if people aren’t afraid to go to the doctor! I don’t want the clerk at the grocery store to tell me, as she is coughing all over my purchases, that she just can’t afford to go to the doctor! I want her to be able to go to the doctor without losing her job, and without missing a car payment.

The problem with all of this is that real healthcare reform gets down to an ugly, ugly truth that none of us wants to face. We all have the ability to take better care of our bodies and most of us don’t.  I’m fat. I eat too much and I don’t exercise enough. I have high blood pressure and high cholesterol and I don’t do enough to control either one. I take my medicine and cut down on fat and salt, but I could do so much more. I’m blessed to have a super immune system and I very seldom get sick. So if I really took care of by body and controlled my weight I would save myself and the healthcare system a lot of money! I could get by with my annual checkup and a few tests, instead of seeing my doctor three times a year. I think it’s safe to say that most people in this country could do a better job of taking care of their own body so someone else doesn’t have to do it!

As usual I haven’t solved a thing with my thoughts this morning. But perhaps at least for today I will be a little more aware of the part I play in this problem. At least for today I will try to walk a few more steps and drink more water and eat more vegetables and skip my afternoon snack. At least for today I will remember that health care is first and foremost my own responsibility.