The View from Here

Revealations

This week I’ve been reading the school news for 1947-49, the years that my mother went to high school. She didn’t graduate because she got married when she was a junior and Dad was a senior. Shortly after he graduated they moved to California with his parents and other family members.

Reading the “Caddo High Times” has been informative and enjoyable, but also somewhat distressing. Why didn’t I know more about Mom’s high school days? Why can’t I recall talking with her about her experiences in FHA? When I was elected president did she tell me that she had served as treasurer? Did we ever talk about her trips to the state rally? Did she tell me about her cooking award? I honestly can’t remember. Nor did I realize that she was in the band. I didn’t know she participated in several speech activities. Perhaps, like many teens, I was just so focused on my own high school days that I didn’t think hers were relevant. Regardless of the reason for my ignorance, reading about her activities in school has revealed a side of her that I never knew existed.

I guess we all tend to think of our parents as mature and staid, wise and nurturing, responsible and authoritative. We know that they were once carefree and perhaps even careless teenagers, just like we were. However, sometimes we need to be reminded by the printed proof.

My mom was a very active, talented student. I’m so happy that I took the time this week to find items like this:

The Caddo Herald

January 16, 1948

Evils of Strong Drink is Score at School Play

A special assembly in recognition of temperance week was presented at high school Wednesday under direction of Mrs. Seago.

Program as follows:

Flag Salute: Howard Cochran

Assembly singing by all.

What the Bible says about drinking: Paul Edmonds

Prayer: Mrs. Taylor

Face the Facts: Colleen Springer and Betty Adams

Good Health: Band, Sixth Grade

I refuse to drink because: James Troxell

Yield Not to Temptation: Junior Girls Quartet

An Educational Campaign: Floydene Morgan

The Drunken Driver Needs His Brains Checked: Bob Hallmark

“You Can’t Fool Us”, a playlet:

Charles Choate- Mr. Wet

Joel Clark- Mr. Alcohol

Six Grade Children

If you’d like to read more, visit my Family Ties blog.

Family Fun

One of the benefits of a social media site like Facebook is the opportunity it provides for those of us cut off from family and friends to still share their adventures and special events. Like many of you Gary and I know people in dozens of states and a few foreign countries. We have relatives scattered from coast to coast and beyond. There is no way we could personally take part in birthday parties, summer vacations, and graduations each time they occur. But we can certainly see the events in photos and enjoy the fun!

I was thinking about “fun” last week when I was researching some family history. It amazes me sometimes that I have such fond memories of my childhood and I remember so much laughter and happiness. I mean seriously…we were so poor most of the time and we spent so much time working in the fields and we lacked so many basic amenities…and yet. We enjoyed Sunday drives and evenings at the drive in and fishing at the river and dinners at grandmother’s house. And when we traveled we weren’t always in a hurry to get to a new job or a new house. Dad often stopped to let us “see the sights” and enjoy the trip. We managed to have some simple family fun.

My children will probably tell you that their childhood was barely one financial step above my own. Although they didn’t have to work in the fields, they did not have a lot of the toys and privileges and opportunities enjoyed by their peers. We couldn’t afford a lot of the things they wanted to do. We didn’t take a lot of vacations. But we still had fun! I had forgotten about some of the things we did until I found this file of old slides.

For those of you who don’t know or just don’t remember, slides were a form of photography that was popular in the seventies and eighties because they could be placed in a little projecting machine and shown to friends and family members. It was an easy way to share family fun before there was FB! Lol We still have about 1,000 of them, but several years ago we scanned and copied them to digital files. Somehow these got into a “misc” file and when I looked at them recently I was struck by the repetition of “mom and children” they portray. There were no “selfies” so Gary was usually on the back side of the camera!

I’m not sure my children recall all of these as happy times, but seeing them reassures me that we tried to balance their lives between work and play, hardship and happiness. I think my parents approved our efforts. They even joined us a few times. These photos bring a smile to my face and gratefulness to my heart. I hope your family fun will also be fondly remembered.

Bread...the Staff of Life and the Stuff of Dreams

The weather forecast for this week included our first possibility of a freeze, so I did what any practical, logical person would do. I bought a new filter for the heater, covers for the faucets, and biscuits for our post-freeze breakfast. Don’t judge…I know you’re thinking right now about biscuits with either gravy (Gary’s choice) or butter and honey or jelly. Honey is my choice. Mom loved jelly. My dad preferred biscuits and syrup instead of pancakes!

Thursday night Gary and I went to the theater in Caddo. After the movie, my friend Nancy talked for a few minutes about her memories of visiting my great-aunt Molly. Of course even the mention of her name leads me to memories of her famous hot rolls! They were the best ever…and I was always jealous of the school children she served them to each week. I had to wait months and months to visit her in Texas and devour them. Her sister, Bea, made good hot rolls, but I think Molly’s were better because she made so many, so often. Practice makes perfect!

I still have one of Gran’s bread recipes and I’ve used it often. I had to insist that she write it down for me, because like most cooks of her generation she didn’t use a written recipe or precisely measure each ingredient. Her hands and head and heart worked in unison and simply knew what to do. And I think it says a lot about our family and our traditions and my personal preferences that I didn’t ask for her meat loaf or lasagna recipe. Bread was the only item on the dinner menu that I wanted to immortalize.

Did you know that bread is mentioned in the Bible over 300 times? (I don’t think there is a single mention of kale.) God used the most basic of foods to feed people, both literally and figuratively. Many lessons of the Bible are taught in parables about bread.  People understood the attributes of bread- few ingredients, easy to make and share, portable, able to satisfy and sustain. It was the perfect analogy to the gospel.

Bread has fallen from grace lately. Gluten-free is the current “designer label” for food and many people are convinced that wheat is evil. I understand that gluten is like poison for the 1% of the population with Celiac disease. I also understand that other people with certain stomach problems and skin conditions benefit from a gluten-free diet. However, the jury is still out on the pros and cons of a gluten-free diet for the general population. I have my own personal diet limitations: can’t tolerate aspartame, eat kiwis or tuna, can’t drink tomato or grapefruit juice. I don’t expect the rest of America to adapt to my restrictions, so I don’t plan to align my diet with those who suffer from wheat sensitivity.

Some of you probably noticed that I said earlier that I “bought” biscuits. Yes, I buy frozen ones for two reasons. First of all, I can bake one or two or six. The smallest batch I can make from scratch is about a dozen and they probably wouldn’t last the day on our table. Neither Gary nor I need to eat that many! Second, even as a retired person I am frugal with my time and I don’t want to spend an hour cooking breakfast. I can pop a couple of frozen biscuits in the oven, cook some eggs, and sit down to eat in half that time. Frozen biscuits don’t taste the same as fresh, but they are good enough, especially with butter and a little honey.

No…there isn’t a frozen “hot roll” that comes close to homemade. At some point this winter I’ll put aside all concerns about time and effort (and calories), take out Gran’s recipe, and make rolls from scratch. Who cares how many rolls it makes? We’ll manage…

A Less Than Perfect Day...

We watched the weather report and considered staying home.  But we decided that even if we didn’t take any photos we would still enjoy seeing the refuge. We also wondered if the geese had arrived yet.

The wind was blowing at 30-40mph.

It was cold.

It was sunny, then cloudy, then rainy.

It hailed for a few minutes.

But we had a GREAT time at the refuge!

So happy that we went.

We Just Need One

Well, it’s been about a month since we found out that our landlord is selling this house and we will need to find another one. Our search so far has been interesting, but not successful. However, I’m not discouraged yet because God has worked on our behalf in the past and we’ve lived in a variety of houses, mobile homes, and vehicles. Each one had its own merits and each one served our needs at the time. That’s what is exciting about this new phase of our life- what comes next may be the best of all!

It is a bit frustrating to realize that most people don’t want to rent their property to strangers. I understand that. I’ve seen how some people “care” for the property of others. I can’t live the way they do. I always feel an obligation to treat a house as my home, and to care for it the same way I would if I owned it.

And yes, we have owned houses in the past. We gave that up when we started transferring and traveling for Gary’s job. Later we realized we liked the idea of having someone else be responsible for repairs, taxes, and renovations. Have we lost money while renting and moving? Sure. But homeownership also has it problems and losses. And we’ve been privileged to live in a few homes that we could never have afforded to purchase. I have no regrets about our lifestyle.

Like many people we have been “down-sizing” for the last few years. As we get older we need fewer things and it seems silly to make room for stuff that is just collecting dust. I still have most of my elephant collection because each one came from a friend or relative and is connected to a pleasant memory- so I’m really collecting memories. However, I definitely didn’t need 40 coffee cups! So most of those are already gone. When we moved to this smaller house in town we got rid of some larger pieces of furniture. And I’ll readily admit that I just recently shredded old financial papers from 2005. Each move makes our life simpler. Now we can easily downsize from a three-bedroom home to a two. At some point in the future we may be in a one-bedroom apartment. I’ll wait and see.

For now we just need one house to call our own for a while. And that’s the key to my still-positive attitude. There are thousands of homes in our county!! We only need to find one…and I’m confident we’ll do that soon.

Glorious...

There are times when I struggle to work in my little garden. I have to admit that even though I love being outside, I do not love being in pain, and I certainly do not love being disabled. But as I’ve discovered in the past, no matter how much I struggle I always feel better after doing a little work. There is something so therapeutic about being outside among the flowers and the creatures they attract. And when you walk outside to find that the morning glories have exploded into a massive blanket of blue…there are no regrets at all about a little bit of pain.

Heritage Day

Spent the day taking pictures and even managed to pose for a couple. Gary was at the car show when our award was announced, so we met up later for a photo. Windy day+humidity= wild hair! 

 

 

In All Honesty...

For the past few weeks I’ve been writing about my childhood on my Family Ties blog. Those of you who have been following any of my personal writing for the past twelve years know that I strive to be honest and open about most aspects of my life. However, I do not and will not discuss certain topics, people, and experiences. Like you, I have secrets that will go with me to my grave. Most of them have little to do with guilt over my own actions. I’ve already asked forgiveness for some senseless things I did in my youth. I trust that you have. Learning from our mistakes is a natural part of growing up and hopefully we grow in wisdom and discernment as we mature.

No, most of the secrets I keep are about the actions of others. Talking about them would serve no purpose and in some instances would hurt the feelings of their loved ones. None of my secrets are about anything that can be changed. None of my secrets are about anything that is dangerous or currently affecting me in any way. They all took place in the past and should remain there.

I felt compelled to talk about this because of the “me too” movement. Many of the instances of abuse that are being talked about now should have been reported when they occurred. Abuse of any kind should not be tolerated…and yet, I understand. As someone who at various times was molested, abused, threatened, harassed, stalked, and beaten, I understand the power of fear more clearly than most. But as someone who reported most of those problems and was rescued by the power of love, respect, and forgiveness, I do not feel compelled to recall or discuss those times in detail. Names and dates are no longer important and my life has been filled by far, far more love and joy than pain.

So, I understand and respect that some secrets are necessary. Some are respectful. Some are kept out of love and kindness. But let’s make sure that none of us keep secrets because of fear or misplaced guilt.

If someone is hurting you, please don’t keep it a secret.

Lessons Learned from History

I suppose some people find it strange that I spend so much time reading and writing about the past. I read about the history of our country, Native Americans, women, education. I research the history of the area, Caddo in particular. I read and write about my own history…my childhood, my family, my experiences. You would think that my obsession with the past would hinder my ability to function in the here and now. Actually, my understanding of the past enables me to endure the challenges of the present, appreciate my blessings, and face the future with faith and hope. As the Bible says, “there is nothing new under the sun”, and indeed my reading and research proves that to be so.

Since my brother’s death I’ve been more interested than ever in our family history and I’ve been reading some old letters, my diary, documents, etc. I also have lots of photos and a few scrapbooks. I’m trying, on my Family Ties blog, to tell more of “my story” with the intention of just entertaining and informing those family members who outlive me. It has been an enjoyable experience and I’m surprised by a few things in my past that I had forgotten about. One was an entry in my diary stating that I wanted to be a history teacher. I remember planning to be a ballerina, an artist, nurse, architect, English teacher, writer, model, movie star, and mother of a dozen children, but somehow “history teacher” wasn’t filed in my memory. Makes perfect sense in retrospect.

Reading about America’s history keeps me calm, despite our current pattern of crisis and disaster. We’ve faced most of this before and not only survived, but thrived. Until the Lord decides otherwise, we’ll continue to be challenged by nature, by our government, by our own mistakes. Such is life…

Reading about the history of Caddo gives me a sense of belonging here that’s sometimes difficult to describe. Although I was born in another state and spent many years away, Caddo has always had a profound emotional appeal for me. Even now, I can’t fully explain it.  I suppose we don’t have to understand and explain everything in life. Perhaps it’s enough to just appreciate and enjoy!

Beautiful Surprise!

There was a big package in my mailbox yesterday and inside it was this lovely quilt from my cousin. I’m so grateful for her skill and creativity! And I feel blessed that she chose to share her talents with me!

Several members of our family are quilters. It’s a skill I never could quite master, despite years of sewing. Gran always kept a quilt on a frame in her bedroom. It actually hung above her bed and she could lower and lift it as needed. In later years she preferred to crochet because she could do that anywhere at any time.

Quilting started out as a way for women to recycle old clothing and bits of leftover fabric. It has become so much more, and I’m proud to have this piece of art to add color and beauty to my bedroom.And the tag is just a bonus!!