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I have been mourning the last few years the loss of another person who shared my life. I didn't realize the value of such until I sat on my brother's couch at my sister's funeral. We spoke together of childhood memories, sharing laughter and even fleshing events out for each other. I returned to Utah perplexed and yet grounded.

Not that my loss is directed around a specific person or event, for me it is the complete loss of any history/frame of reference/shared events. To stand alone, no smell or music or event to trigger a memory. And questioning what little I recall as even valid anymore without an outside person recalling and seconding the experience.

But a couple hours excursion into a verified, triggered past makes the independence of the rest of a life very very lonely. I've tried to explain to Trent several times how incredible it is to hear his siblings share and laugh and even chasten each other about their upbringing. To me it is wondrous.

But the last few years have become full of aches and a rushing sense of time. I think you are the first person I've ever heard verbalize what it feels like to lose shared experiences and a sense of history. There is no way to understand it without experiencing it. (Not that there aren't many people who experience the loss you are describing. I just don't know any at this point in my life or my peer's lives.)

And I am sorry for your experience.

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