I’m not much of a worrier, but I dislike the idea of venturing too far into the “unknown” regardless of the circumstance. So I often prepare myself for a new situation by anticipating at least three possible outcomes and what I might do. I’m that “what if…” person who likes to think of her process as simply planning, not worrying. But I have to admit that sometimes I cross the line a wee bit.
Matthew admonished us “do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Most of us have certainly found that to be true. It is also true that what we choose to worry about can often be totally exaggerated. And the Bible also assures us that we can’t add a day to our lives by worrying. So I don’t know what we hope to accomplish by doing it anyway.
Yesterday, as I was waiting for Gary to park the car at the hospital, I had a sudden vision of our years ahead: hospital visits, doctor visits, medications, tests, illnesses and pains. Then I laughed to myself as I realized it has always been so. When we have not been through all of that with each other, we have done so with our children and other family members. Bodies are frail things and we seldom take good care of them. Accidents and illnesses happen to everyone. No one is without pain or problems. And as though to serve as even more of a reminder, when we went inside we encountered three friends who were also getting treated for various things. “Such is life,” my grandmother would say.
My “what if” plans weren’t even needed yesterday. The bone scan wasn’t nearly as traumatic as I had feared. The injection of dye was nearly painless and I didn’t notice any side effects whatsoever. I’m always fearful, due to past experiences, that anything introduced into my body might trigger a migraine. Lying still wasn’t a problem either, since each scan was 15 minutes or less. I’ve had previous MRI scans that have nearly driven me insane because of the time required to complete them. The whole process was over by 3pm and we were free to go about our business.
So, now I await the test results. What if the news is not good? I’ll try the treatment options and see what happens next. And what if the test doesn’t show anything conclusive, doesn’t provide a reason why my foot is stiff, swollen, and sore? Well, I guess I’ll wait and see what my doctor thinks I should do next. But that is scheduled for next week.
For today I’m going to enjoy my yard and my flowers and see what surprises my Saturday brings…