The View from Here

Marriage 101

 

It’s still several weeks until our anniversary, our 39^th anniversary, but I was thinking last night about how much I enjoy my husband’s company. He had to work late and so I spent the evening alone. I’m not bored by being alone. I have plenty of things to do. I’m not afraid to be alone. And I have a lot of experience with being alone since Gary drove a truck for a dozen years. But I prefer his company, even if we are in separate rooms doing different things. We wander in and out, talking and laughing. We share thoughts and feelings. We moan and groan a bit about our health or our day or the latest news report. We get along like old friends…because we are.

I used to think that a good marriage was about love and romance and roses. After the first twenty years I realized it’s more about respect and commitment and tolerance. I’m not sure why, but most women seem to enter a relationship with the idea that they can change a man into their ideal mate. Listen up all you younger ladies- they can be housebroken, but they can’t be tamed! If your man has a really bad habit now, chances are he will have it twenty years from now. And yes, Gary has some habits that still drive me crazy! Well, maybe not so much anymore since he is so predictable. But I still fuss a bit and he either fusses back, or ignores me.

My point, in my usual rambling way, is that people are a package deal. You take the good the bad and the ugly and you figure out how to make things work. I have a few habits and personality traits of my own that might make another man run for the hills, but Gary has tolerated my wicked ways quite well. He even seems to enjoy my company. We have created a balance in our lives between what makes us happy and what does not.

And life has not been easy for us. We have experienced some things that no one should have to endure. We have been sick and poor and distraught and frightened, but we have been all of those things together. We have also been joyful and blessed beyond anything we deserve…together.

So it may be a few weeks before our anniversary, but sometimes I just have to say what I think, regardless of the date on the calendar. Here’s to a good husband and a marriage that works for us.

Have a great day!

Safe and Sound

 

Yesterday we dismissed early because of an impending storm. Thunder and lightning and winds of destruction are a fact of life in Oklahoma, but our safety has become somewhat more assured by improvements in storm prediction and tracking. Advance warning enables us to do things like send our students home early to be with their parents or keep them in our “safe room”. Advance warning allows people time to seek shelter in cellars and basements. Technology is changing the way people once faced the challenges of spring storms. There was even a report on the news last night of a company that is building steel framed homes that can withstand winds of 100mph. However, nature often trumps our genius and property and lives are taken from us despite our precautions.

 

So spring remains one of our annual challenges. And even if we have ample warning before a tornado, sometimes nothing can prevent the awful experience of driving home in the heavy rains that precede it. Yesterday I started home in a light mist which soon turned into increasingly heavier rain. I was soon driving 40-50mph in a torrential downpour, accentuated by hail, and praying each time I saw a truck in my rear view mirror. When I finally made it to the Caddo exit and turned west I drove almost immediately into sunshine and blue skies. Didn’t even need my wipers!

 

Gary greeted me with, “Hey, you just missed the storm!” Not exactly.

 

 

After three cups of coffee I walked around and took these photos.  The plants are happy that they got some much-needed rain. I just wish we had gotten it in hours, not minutes!

 

Stay safe!

Random thoughts...

I am so happy I became a teacher.

I thank God that I am feeling so much better. Prayers answered.

I am thankful that I have children.

I feel blessed to have such a good husband.

I don’t know what I would do without my friends.

I am glad that I have learned so much about my family’s past.

I love Oklahoma!

I am so happy that the weather is warming up.

I am glad that my daughter inspired me to write a blog. This is post #1240!

Have a great day!!

 

A Wal-Mart Vegetarian

It has been a while since I’ve posted a Monday blog about nutrition. It became obvious that despite my efforts to change my wicked ways, something was terribly wrong and I wasn’t making much progress in losing weight. My pain levels kept increasing and my exercise efforts decreased exponentially. So I laid down the gauntlet for a while. Well, I’m back to try something new and I hope it will encourage some of you to make one more change in your diet.

Eat more veggies, please.

Yes, for two months I’m embracing the lacto-ovo-vegetarian diet. That means milk (1%), eggs (Egg Beaters), fruits, and veggies. I’m doing this to see if it makes a difference in my cholesterol, because if you have been following my saga you know I can no longer tolerate the statin I was taking. And just as an update, I had another wonderful pain-free night!

That being said, I want you to know that future posts will not be about my conversion to a better life or animal rights or saving the planet. I’m not making a political statement or embracing a new culture or trying to impress people. Just trying to find a way to offset some of the defective genes I was given. I’m still a country woman and I see no reason for the world to stop producing and eating meat. I wish some of it was produced more humanely and safely, but that’s just a reality of food manufacturing. We need to make changes that will improve ALL of the food industry. Many of the recent recalls for tainted food have been veggies!

The actions and attitudes of many vegetarians seem purposely aimed at bewildering and belittling others. I don’t understand why eating plants has to be complicated or involve eating things I can neither identify nor cook without a guidebook. Why does “vegetarian” have to equate to a total shift in diet that includes seaweed and wheat grass? Why does being a vegetarian mean never again gracing the door of Olive Garden? And why in the world does it mean being constantly in someone’s face about your food choices? When someone offers me a soda I just say, “no thanks”. I don’t have to say, “I never drink those nasty things and you shouldn’t either and here’s why….”  

And for those of you who are wondering—yes, I still cook meat for my husband. Why should he change his eating habits to accommodate my health problems? My grandmother ate meat every day of her life and lived to be over ninety. Everyone is different! Saturday he had a real beef cheeseburger and I had a Morning Star Grillers cheeseburger and we both had French fries. The lowly potato is still a vegetable in my book and a few cooked in olive oil won’t hurt me. I also like peanut butter, salads, spaghetti with mushrooms and olives, grilled cheese sandwiches, beans.  A meatless diet doesn’t have to be weird.

So, I may not make any points with the diehard vegetarians, but I’ll muddle through this with whatever I can find at my local Wal-Mart. And I’ll be in the booth next to you at Taco Mayo eating my bean burrito in silence. You don’t have to join me if you don’t want to.

Windy!

 

So what do you photograph when the wind is blowing 40mph and you have to hold on to the door to make sure it doesn’t slam against you? The neighbors cows of course! Nothing bothers them. If it is windy they just eat sitting down. Lol

Yes, I’m knocking on wood as I type this and I know it may well be the “placebo effect”, but I already feel much better after discontinuing my cholesterol medication. I did a lot of extra walking yesterday and even some lifting and yet slept very well last night. No pain, no burning sensations.

I am also taking the whole vegetarian diet in stride. Just wasn’t much of a meat eater anyway. My doctor has cautioned me that I may be one of those people who will still have high cholesterol despite dietary changes, but it is certainly worth a try for two months. If I feel better and lose a few pounds it’s all good!

 

Please pray for my aunt. She has been having some medical problems and she is one of my favorite people. I just hate to hear that she is sick!

I hope the wind stops this nonsense soon so I can put out some new mulch and potting soil. By the way, I read yesterday that potting soil easily catches on fire and burns rapidly if it is dry. Don’t let anyone put out a cigarette in your favorite potted plant!

 

Not much to say today, but the pictures are fun!

Have a good one…

My Lucky Day

I don’t really believe in luck. I believe that things happen for a reason and that God is in control, so yesterday was more like, “Hey, what did I do to deserve this?”

First of all, it was warm. Loving these days that are 70+ degrees.

I went to our staff development meeting and was given a ticket as I sat down. I soon turned it in for a $100 door prize! Yeah!

I got a sweet compliment from one of my colleagues.

We had a good meeting and I got several ideas for improving my teaching and classroom management.

I went to the genealogy library to search for a marriage announcement. Using the date that the family gave me I checked the paper and could not find it, but I DID find another one that I had been searching for in vain, AND a political campaign ad I wanted for my biographies book. Two great finds!

Went to the doctor and whined about the pain in my legs. He is going to take me off the statins for two months to see what happens. Pray that this is the cure! I have lots of gardening and photographing to do and I need two strong legs.

Also trying the vegetarian diet and it is easy, easy. Guess I wasn’t a big meat fan in the first place, and there are lots of veggie alternatives for burgers and breakfast sausage. I’m becoming a fan of Morning Star Farms. And on the advice of a very smart friend, I’m increasing my fiber and potassium.

Ended the day with some great conversation, a few good emails, and another interesting find in the papers I brought home- an article about Caddo’s first high school annual. BTW, it cost $2 and our current one is $40. Lol

It is blustery and a bit colder today, but I’ll be out and about with the camera anyway. I have to take a couple of headstone shots at the cemetery. Hope to photograph some of the flowers in town.

Have a great day and a wonderful weekend!

Spring, spring, spring

 

More little signs of spring everywhere. Insects are out and about. Calves in the neighbor’s pasture. More daffodils. Buds on trees. And the sad sign- fires. I just hope everyone is careful this year and we don’t have any major blazes.

 

Started a new photo folder for March. I saved 332 images from my yard in February. That means I took at least three times that. And photos from other locations are saved in a different folder.  I have become an addict. Lol Gary still teases me because at first I was actually afraid to use this camera.

 

 

 

Hope spring is headed your way!

  

A Few Good Men

I’ve spent most of my life in the company of men- observing them, listening to them, envying them, loving them, despising them, mothering them, and admiring them. I’ve also spent a lot of time being very angry with men, and extremely disappointed in their behavior.

For the first twelve years of my life I lived in a man’s world- the open fields. We saw a few women who worked the grape vineyards and cotton fields and the drying yard, but for the most part the farm laborers who worked beside us were men and boys. When we lived on the dairy- men. When my dad worked for a construction crew in Texas-men.

And at home my primary contacts were my parents, grandparents, an aunt, two uncles, two great-uncles, and my three brothers. My mother was not a “joiner” except for church, and she didn’t have the time or opportunities to make a lot of women friends. We moved once or twice or even three times a year. We often lived in the country, away from other families, and we worked such long hours that my parents had little time for socializing. I recall about three times that they left us and went out with someone else.

I used to think that men were powerful and strong and dependable and industrious. I thought they could, and would, take care of everyone and make the world a better place. That rosy philosophy lasted for about nine years, until I discovered that my grandfather was an alcoholic, my uncle was a convict, and my math teacher was a bully. The world shifted slightly that year and it has never been the same.

Even as an adult I worked for eight years in printing, publishing, and advertising, an industry dominated by men. It wasn’t until I began working in daycare that I really had daily contact with women. So I’ve spent much of my life trying to understand men. I’ve decided that it probably isn’t possible. I’m a woman. Even a child raised with wolves can’t really be one.

I’ve had these thoughts rattling around in my brain because our community recently lost three good men. I wasn’t particularly close to any of them since I didn’t spend that much of my childhood here. But I knew them in passing and from church and from a few business dealings. I knew them because they were friends and family of friends and family. That’s what it is like in a small town. And I know that Caddo will not be able to replace them.

I spend about twenty to thirty hours a month researching and reading about the men and women who have lived in Caddo since 1872. After five years of this I have come to the conclusion that while women have always worked for the establishment and betterment of the town and continue to do so, the number of men doing the same has waxed and waned to an alarming low point.  Caddo once had a group of 52 businessmen who formed a club in order to improve and promote the town. Many of our senior men spent their prime years focused on church, family, and community. They worked hard to provide a living for their families and to care for their neighbors. Now they are dying off at an alarming rate.

In the meantime there has been a shift in our society that has meant a dramatic change in community service. More women are working fulltime and caring for their families while trying to help in their church and community. More men are working fulltime while indulging in self-gratification: sports, hobbies, video games, and personal improvement (running, body building). It is not my imagination that many of the mothers I come in contact with complain constantly about being alone. It is not my imagination that many men know more about the NFL than what is going on in their own neighborhood. It is not my imagination that many men care more about the size of their next television or the apps for their new phone than they do about upgrading the local school.

 I don’t mean to trash men. And I know that the older generation had its faults. But as a whole, as a group, I think they were more mature and dedicated and selfless. They grew up in different times and had different expectations. Perhaps I just admired the wrong generation. The men who are now seventy to ninety were the foundation of our town that exists now. I’m just afraid that when they are all gone the town will go too.

March Makes Me Smile

 

I love to flip the calendar to March and usually do so with a sigh of relief. March means spring. I don’t care if there is a brief cold front here and there. March is the official mark of the new season and I can see it on the calendar now: March 20, First day of Spring.

I’ll be wearing out my welcome at Lowe’s very soon. I need potting soil and mulch and plants and new gloves… I think there is also a new riding mower in our future. Gary and I are both getting too old, or too lazy, to push a mower around for hours each week.

March is also my “oh my goodness, where did the year go?” month for school planning. I can now see the rest of my themes and lessons on one brief page of notes. The materials I need are contained in a few file folders. Just a few weeks left to prepare my little chicks for the transition to first grade. How did this happen? What have I forgotten? What more can I do? Panic…lol

Our son’s birthday is March 13. Great-nephew’s birthday is the 26^th. More celebrating!

Spring break is right around the corner. Hopefully the week of March 14 will be all about sunshine and warmth and flowers.

March makes me smile!