My guys were both gone yesterday and I spent the day alone. That used to be my standard life style when Gary was driving a truck, but I haven't done it in a while. And although I enjoyed it, I think I did so only because it was temporary. I'm not the sort of person who craves company, but do love people. I enjoy conversation. I like doing things with someone. My husband and I are close friends with many interests in common and we often go places and do things together. I'm not sure I would want to spend the rest of my days alone.
I have several friends, recently widowed, who are facing that very future. It's a tough transition for anyone. One made the comment that her husband did so much for her, and handled so many things- now she must figure out how to do them on her own. She hadn't even pumped her own gas in years. Many women are clueless about money, insurance, household expenses, etc. Their husbands managed that side of their life. Other women say that they shared all the responsibilities with their husbands and they can take care of themselves, but the loss of companionship is devastating. Just think about going out- to the movies, to dinner, to a museum, to the park- ALONE. Easy for some, terrifying for others.
There are millions of women-single, divorced, and widowed- who live alone. I wonder how many of them do it by choice, and how many have simply become a victim of circumstance and made the best of things. That's what we do as women- make the best of things. I've always told Gary that if something happens to him I will live alone because I don't want to "housebreak another man".
Of course my plan is for Gary and I to grow old together. We'll be tottering around with our matching canes, finishing each other's sentences, holding each other up, helping each other through the day. I hope it works out that way. We both come from families with ancestors who lived to be 90 or older. We are basically healthy. We don't have too many bad habits. We live in a fairly good environment for longevity. Maybe it will work out that way. Perhaps you'll see us on television when we celebrate our sixtieth wedding anniversary. Until then I'll enjoy an occasional day alone...I just don't want to make a habit of it.